23rd years for nothing
today is the 23rd years i’ve been living in this world, and i live for nothing. just do the usual human-doing like breathing, eating, sleeping, walking, nothing special. tonight when i realized, what can i do for make it worthier? i saw my friends and some-other people i know (but may be they don’t know me anyway) now living with their dreams, at least they know what they want to do to live. but i, i don’t know what am i doing right now. i am working right now, but is it in the field i want? i don’t think so. what do i want? i want to have a job where i enjoy doing it; it doesn’t mean i’m not enjoying my present job. i enjoy this job; i take pleasure in this job. why? because i love to work with a lot of people and i get it from this job; also a great team i belong to. i can’t tell how great this team work, unspeakable but i love them. but i want more (yeah, i know, no word ‘enough’ in people’s dictionary); i want the job i’ve been dreaming. working with many people is my pleasure, it will be more when i can talk to them personally, knowing their personalities, abilities, etc. i’m thinking of my future carrier on hr department. i think that’s a perfect place where i can enjoy my job. do any chance? a lot of it! i’m trying to get it but it doesn’t work till today.
i used to say ‘i want to be like him in this way’ or ‘i want to be like her in this way’ or anybody else. i always think that i am worthless than they are, like i said before, no word ‘enough’. i always want to be more. not more than anybody, i want to be more than i am right now. so, improving yourself, makes it worthier, learn to something new; don’t be afraid with deviances, face it!
these are my resolution for my 23rd years:
a. got a new job i used to dream where i can enough time to do something else to improving myself.
b. learn for french!! i’m crazy with this language, want to learn and fluent in it.
c. doing some ‘job’ for god. i’ve been away from my ministry activities and i want to get involved back, but i don’t have time right now, hope i can do it when i reached my 1st resolution.
d. get settled in one place. today i can’t decide where i have to live. i love surabaya as well as i love denpasar, bali. i have to choose one, and still can’t do it. may be my 1st resolution can help me later.
this is it…. now i continue my life and make it worthier than before.
ps: this note i wrote only for self motivation. thanks for read.